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NOTE FROM JONAH: This is the continuation of a photo series from the Philippines. If you are just joining, here’s what you’ve missed so far:

1. Mabuhay! Welcome to the Philippines
2. The Philippines: By the Numbers
3. Yahoo! and I disagree
4. Two wheels across the Republic of Bohol
5. The Mogwai lives in Bohol
6. Chocolate Hills not as soft as they look

Near the center of the island of Bohol 1,776 strikingly similar shaped hills jut from the earth. They are spread out over an area of more than 50 square kilometres and resemble something like a martian golf course (at least what I picture them looking like). While these hills are green during the wet season, the hot sun during the dry season turns the hill undulating lumps a shade of brown, giving them the name the Chocolate Hills.

From a distance these hills look like big sponges protruding from the earth. Perhaps something you could jump on like a trampoline, sleep on instead of a soft bed or just someplace to have a nice picknick.

This is what I thought from viewing platform where many tourists visit every year doing silly things like jumping on broomsticks in front of the hills for a photo, giving the perspective that they are witches … in front of strange hills. After staring at these bizarre earth formations with hundreds of my closest friends who also happened to be on the viewing platform, I thought the best option would be to take the motorbike into the maze and climb one of these chocolate hills.

I began to drive my motorbike away from the viewing platform and the heaps of tourists towards some hills in the distance. We drove through mud, grass and even some streams before we got to the edge of one of the more than 1,700 uniformly shaped, undulating hills.

As I began my hike up, I realized these hills are much steeper than they appeared. I also learned very quickly that the ground which makes up the hills, essentially crumbles as you walk on it.

As I scrambled up the hill, I was determined to not let these things detour me, so I continued on. With the sun beating down, the ground crumbling underneath me all things pointed down. So I looked down. That’s when I noticed how sharp the grass was on these falsy soft looking hills. In fact, the grass on these things is so sharp — I realized I had cuts all over my feet, ankles and anywhere else the grass managed to get …

While I did get cut up, I did make it to the top where I got to stare at these marvelous hills — not surrounded by tourists. While there was a painful price, seeing nature without tour buses around is always worth it.

After a little research, I found out that these hills are covered with hard grass species called Imperata cylindrica and Saccharum spontaneum. The hills range in height from 50 to 120 meters. At the entrance to the area, a small sign reads:

The unique land form known as the Chocolate Hills of Bohol was formed ages ago by the uplift of coral deposits and the action of rain water and erosion.
The grassy hills were once coral reefs that erupted from the sea in a massive geologic shift. Wind and water put on the finishing touches over hundreds of thousands of years.

To anyone near Bohol — these lumps are very cool. Add these to some beautiful beaches, strange monkeys all in an area accessible by bike — and you’ve got one great island. Before I leave you on this post, four amusing myths about the origins of these hills from everyone’s friend Wikifriend.

Legends

Four legends explain the formation of the Chocolate Hills.

(1) The first tells the story of two feuding giants who hurled rocks, boulders, and sand at each other. The fighting lasted for days, and exhausted the two giants. In their exhaustion, they forgot about their feud and became friends, but when they left they forgot to clean up the mess they had made during their battle, hence the Chocolate Hills.[12][16]

(2) A more romantic legend tells of a giant named Arogo who was extremely powerful and youthful. Arogo fell in love with Aloya, who was a simple mortal. Aloya’s death caused Arogo much pain and misery, and in his sorrow he could not stop crying. When his tears dried, the Chocolate Hills were formed.

(3) The third legend tells of a town being plagued by a giant carabao, who ate all of their crops. Finally having had enough, the townsfolk took all of their spoiled food and placed it in such a way that the carabao would not miss it. Sure enough, the carabao ate it, but his stomach couldn’t handle the spoiled food, so he defecated, leaving behind him a mound of feces, until he had emptied his stomach of the food. The feces then dried, forming the Chocolate Hills.

(4) The last legend is about a gluttonous giant named Miguel that eats everything in his path. One day he came to a plain. He saw a beautiful young woman named Adrianna. To win her affection, he needed to lose weight. So he excreted everything he ate. In the end, his fecal matter covered the land and he won Eng’s affection.

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NOTE FROM JONAH: This is the continuation of a photo series from the Philippines. If you are just joining, here’s what you’ve missed so far:

1. Mabuhay! Welcome to the Philippines
2. The Philippines: By the Numbers
3. Yahoo! and I disagree
4. Two wheels across the Republic of Bohol
5. The Mogwai lives in Bohol

Rule number one: Don’t get him wet. Rule number two: Keep him away from bright light. “And the most important thing,” says rule number three: “The one thing you must never forget: no matter how much he cries, no matter how much he begs . . . never, never feed him after midnight.”

Yes — the Mogwai exist on the island of Bohol. Don’t know what a Mogwai is?

Ok, so they’re not exactly the same as the addorable character from the 1984 movie Gremlins but they are certainly the closest thing I have ever seen. So, what is it?

This is one of the smallest primate in the world – known as the Tarsier. Literally, smaller than the hand of Chilean artist Jose Cornejo (above). These little guys are about the size of a coke can and have eyes 150 times bigger than a human’s (in relationship to its body size). So — they’re cute, they’re small, they resemble the Mogwai — but Lonely Planet tells us a little more about these fun guys:

This simultaneously crazy and cuddly looking little primate can fit in the palm of our hand yet leap 5 meters, rotate its head almost 360 degrees, and move its ears in the direction of sound.

The Tarsier is not only one of the world’s smallest primates and the oldest surviving member of the primate group at 45 million years old, it is also endangered.

The Tarsier are found only in a few places in the world, Bohol being the easiest place to spot them. I can’t say they were running around the streets like crazy but there are plenty of places to stop on the side of the road and check them out. Sadly, locals have realized the financial potential of these animals and have captured many and put in captivity.

Tarsiers in captivity usually only live for about 12 months even if handled delicately. Even more sad, is locals will ask for money and put one on your shoulder for a picture. Today, illegal tarsier zoos pop up around the island.

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NOTE FROM JONAH: This is the continuation of a photo series from the Philippines. If you are just joining, here’s what you’ve missed so far:

1. Mabuhay! Welcome to the Philippines
2. The Philippines: By the Numbers
3. Yahoo! and I disagree
4. Two wheels across the Republic of Bohol

Surely the best way to see Southeast Asia is on motorbike. By riding in cars, you separate yourself from locals creating both a physical and mental division. Motorbikes (and push bikes) allow you to connect to a population and give you the option of stopping at any point to talk, eat or photograph. After traveling by boat, plane, bus and jeepney — when I got to the island of Bohol the first thing I did was rent a motorcycle.

While there are inland roads, the big road that circles around the island (above) is beuaitful and well maintained. You won’t see guard railings, traffic lights or other such amenities, but you can drive feet away from the ocean for hours on end. What’s also good is — you fit in. While cars certainly exist on these islands the vast, vast majority of the population are on bikes (both motorized and not). So — excuse the cliché, but when in Bohol … do as the Boholanos do.

The Boholanos, you say? The people of this island refer to themselves as Boholanos — which comes from the islands brief period of independence at the end of the 19th century when it was known as the Republic of Bohol. While today, Bohol is clearly part of the Philippines the island seems cultural and ecologically distinct.

The island is located between the Bohol Sea and the Camotes Sea in the Central Philippines. To me, this small island is a very good representation of why traveling in the Philippines or Indonesia is so amazing — because each island has some much individual identity.

Amazingly bizarre landscapes, unique wildlife, fantastic food and (mostly) friendly people on a micro-geographic level. By “micro-geogrphic level” I refer to the fact that the wildlife on Bohol — is specific to Bohol. The dialect, people and landscapes follow suite.

Normally to find a large variety of landscapes, peoples, traditions or wildlife you must travel great distances between locations. However, in island nations it can be as simple as taking a boat for one hour. Hopefully, your boat will be bigger than the one above …

However, a boat this big is fine for a paddle down the Loboc river (above). But perhaps more fun, and definitely more bizarre, is a tour down the Loboc River on an all you can eat floating buffet.

Imagine a thick, thick jungle with dark green waters (ala Heart of Darkness). Now put a floating restaurant on it and give a 16-year-old Filipino boy a guitar and have him sing Frank Sinatra tunes for a couple hours. This is a bizarre experience not worth missing … and, they serve lobster.

Bohol is known for the Chocolate Hills, the bizarre looking tarsiar, undeveloped white beaches and amazing sea life and diving opportunities. By motorbike, everything is accessible, although some roads can get pretty dodgy. But if you stick to the roads on the map, you should be fine. As for me, that is not always my tendency and I ended up a couple times on steep dirt roads turned mud paths following into the ocean, that had simply been destroyed by mother nature.

However, on these destroyed roads — life still thrives. People and homes — although you’d be hard up to find a business of any kind. I’m not sure if the people leave very often, but there are certainly people there. Most of the houses along the ocean’s edge come on stilts.

While there are certainly far more remote places in the Philippines, showing up on a motorbike at some of these places where roads almost don’t exist is a sure way to turn yourself into a spectacle. In general this happens when you go to someplace non touristy, but in the Philippines people seemed to be very excited to chat, not just stare.

More images from Bohol coming later this week.